So I flipped on my TV when I got home from the grocery store tonight (Got checked out by some gay guys there. Nice. It always makes me think that I dressed well when that happens. Gay guys got sweet fashion sense), and the travel channel was on. I never watch the travel channel. Who watches the travel channel?
Anyway, so now I’m watching the travel channel, and I got hit with so much IQ sucking nonsense in such a short span of time that I had to write it down.
10:15: “I always get a kick out of how people see Las Vegas as this den of sin and debauchery, and, uh, you know, there’s certainly lots of vices here, buuuut, if there was like, a wholesome vice, then this is where you’ll find it.”
Ok, I tried to figure out what the hell that meant, but my nose started bleeding so I had to stop.
10:15 and 30 seconds: Footage of some drunk guy with a pot leaf t-shirt standing in front of a row of women wearing g-strings and leaning against a wall with their asses sticking out, and he’s smiling and getting his picture taken with each hand on a different ass.
10:17: “Very simply, classic rock……topless vampires! It is the epic tale of a lost love, and a vampire searching for that lost love, trying to find his queen of the night.”
10:18: “My intent, I want the audience, I want their heart to stop for just a brief second, and walk out of here saying, oh my God, did I just see what I thought I saw?”
No worries, my friend. No worries.
10:20 “I always said to myself, okay, I want to go to Vegas, but I’m not going to do a show that my dad couldn’t see me do, and I don’t need my dad to see my boobs, ha ha!”
10:20 and 15 seconds: Footage of that same woman doing her non-topless show, slowly crawling on the stage away from the audience, wearing a piece of string and a smile.
She is very talented.
10:22: “I mean, that is what the people come here to see. So there’s a little bit of skin showing- it’s no big deal. There’s nothing unwholesome about it, there’s nothing dirty.”
10:23: Footage of two naked women swimming around in a giant martini glass on stage while another woman in a thong is lying on her back spread eagle in front of the glass and a midget in spandex pants is licking her thigh.
10:24: I add the travel channel to my favorites list.
January 5, 2009 at 12:15 PM
Is it on Direct TV???? I mean, we got Skin-a-Max…but not the Travel Channel!!!!
January 5, 2009 at 1:18 PM
The sad thing is that when I went to Vegas, I SAW THAT TOPLESS VAMPIRE CLASSIC ROCK SHOW.
I feel shame.
January 5, 2009 at 1:40 PM
I know Stephanie, my brand new TV is now a dirty dirty hoar thanks to the travel channel. I must constantly watch to find out how deep the depravity goes.
Hey Sarah,LMAO! Did you walk out of the theatre not believing what you just saw? I probably would have to go see it too. At one point, it looked like he was doing some sort of flippity floppity flim flam with sticks all aflame, and I was like “Damn, that half naked dancing-with-fire vampire has himself some mad talent.”